Sunday evening of last week -
After a long weekend of fun, a small bit of drama I haven't even gotten into yet and hardly any sleep, sunday night after the booty call turned into a great time. After brunch, we headed to a festival in downtown BK, which we ignored and went to our fav mexican watering hole for drinks and food. The comma started to settle in when we headed next door to a fish-named bar and just when we were about to wrap up the evening, it began to down pour. With us having no rain gear, we ran under the overhang over the outside bar and sat until it stopped. That's when the bartender cranked up the Daft Punk and LCD Soundsystem and a full on dance party began. Many drinks, shots and a conga line later and I was a gross, sweaty mess. We then headed to a street fair, ate some fried oreo's then realized we all had to work the next day and crashed. Sunday's rock.

Last Monday - around 12pm -
This guy I've been seeing, let's call him ADHD, decided that because of the problems we've been having, he wanted to read a list of what was on his mind that morning on the train.
And it goes a little something like this:
First - "I masturbate 5 to 6 times a week... to hardcore girl-on-girl porn"
um... what?
Second - "And I like the butt. I like my hands around the butt, everything. I like the butt"
(now i'm just blankly staring at him)
Third - "I'm threatened by your relationship with your best friend who is a guy that is married to your other best friend"
(now my eyes are shooting dragon sized fireballs at him)
Forth - "My ex called me and is coming around... wants to work things out. That's why I'VE been weird"
(I just smile because this jealousy tactic won't work on me, because I DON'T CARE)

There was a bunch of other stuff on the list that he didn't read to me. Maybe because I wasn't reacting the way he expected. ADHD is truly a nice guy with a heart of gold, but COME ON - your masturbation rituals are the FIRST thing on your list???? No ma'am

Proceeded to drink that night...where, I'm not even sure. Wait. Maybe I didn't drink. I don't know.

Later Monday - in the afternoon -
This boy I've been emailing thru an events website makes me laugh with 2 lines of an email, so we exchange ichat names. Proceed to iChat the rest of the day and it makes me smile. I save that IM.

Tuesday evening -
I go to a movie with a friend from work, at a neighborhood park...the movie is an old high school favorite (one hint: "L I V I N") and I decide to meet the online boy there, since he was going anyways (we DID meet on an events website). He shows and I'm under the impression he's gay. Which is great, but a little disappointing. After movie, him and I grab beers locally where he turned the charm on. We drink late into the night and I leave the evening confused about what just happened.

Wednesday -
Get to work around 11am due to the many beers I had the night before. Go out to an all expense paid lunch, where I nursed my hangover with expensive white wine. Get back to work, chat with G/NG (Gay/Not Gay--online boys new name because i'm THAT confused) all day while I work. Plan to leave early to catch a movie with an ex. I leave work, midtown blows up (well, a transform blew up) and me & the ex miss the movie because he's late. I want to drink (duh) and he doesn't. But I know he will...and he does. We proceed to blanket the west side.
I miss him a lot and it's always fun being around him. A lot of drama in the past though that is in the way. But after a couple beers and casual flirting, he asks to kiss me (proper!) and I say yes for the first time in ages. It feels great but I feel immediate guilt. IMMEDIATE. I'm now also blowing off some girlfriends in the E.V. because of this. I leave a little too late, miss the girls and text G/NG who is out playing bingo in BK. FUN!! So I head out there around 11:30pm, thinking I don't have to work in the AM due to explosion. We tie one on, giggle and laugh at the bar w/ gross hipsters all around. 3am rolls around and I'm drunk due to no dinner. G/NG surprises me even more with an AMAZING kiss. Not a little "i'm not sure about what i'm doing" kiss, but a "hold on tight" kiss....and it was. I just pulled back after the first one and said "hi". Damn it! Good kissing always leads to trouble with me. Oh yeah... G/NG is also 24. Cute.
So I head home like a good girl. Night Night!

Thursday - 8:30am - yes - IN THE MORNING -
Text from work "All is well. Come in as soon as you can!" NOOO!
I get in, work work work and eat a cheeseburger. G/NG ichats me up... we're in the middle of a convo about music or movies or something and he says "oh yeah. About that kiss last night. Wow". I smile to myself and pat myself on the back while sitting at my desk. Sleepy though so keep the night minimal.

Friday Evening after work -
2 $2 beers w/ a friend, then head down to my groups place w/ a kickass happy hour. We rock it there for HOURS. Again...drunk. We're loud, talking about who knows what and finally we leave. Me and CMG head to his place. Hit up a couple more bars (no reason we should have done that), hit up a terrible psychic then a fake KFC. Head to his place, do a dance for a couple that's fighting on the street then head to the house, where the crazy boy pours me a cup of gin. A CUP OF GIN. I try to get thru it, then realize i hate gin. We pass out.

Saturday at 12pm -
Wake up drunk. Promise CMG grilled cheese so head to store w/ bed head and sunglasses. Feel like trash buying white bread (I never do that!), fake butter (it spreads easier) and fake cheese singles (just like mom used to make!). Call the ex to be funny and cute (I'm funny and cute when hung over) and we make plans to meet up later on. After my delish grilled cheese, I head home to do laundry and nap. Out the door to meet CMG + The Spanker (out of towner from TX) and we head to an outdoor dance party in a museum. We hit it up there, dance in the crowd then head to a fake beach on the river. Ex + his friend go eat then come meet us. Me, CMG + The Spanker put on dance pants and make a night of it. Meanwhile, G/NG is wanting me to hit up a house party close by, but the dance pants make me nervous. House parties have no dancing (unless you're at one of ours). I hesitate and hang out in the tent.
Me and the ex decide to dance it up on the mini stage. At this moment, I feel like it's our wedding and everyone there is there for us. I've never had that feeling. And as fun as it was, it made me ultimately sad...what if I'm not giving him the chance he deserves? Does he deserve anything from me? Maybe it's the dance pants talking and not me. I push it out of my head.
The 3 of us head to the house party after the ex goes home. It's dead but G/NG is there and he's cuter than ever (not to mention, he sent me a text while I was out that said "come kiss me please"...um. YES). So we find a place on a roof, I try to keep my cool and we hang. Then CMG + The Spanker want to go home, so we call 2 cars. They head back into the city and I share a cab w/ G/NG + his neighbor. He says he still wants to hang and said "Should we go out our place?" I say yes, because I'm thinking he's talking about the bar we hung out after the movie. Nope..."our place" means his place. I end up there, but I'm happy about that because I didn't want to be alone - dance pants were off and I needed coziness.
We lay down, I'm uptight, we make out - now I'm less uptight. But I tell myself and him I'm not ready for whatever follows making out, so we chill it. An hour later, it's hot and heavy again. Now this is the point where basically forget reason and do what my body is demanding I do.
We have sex and it's good...really really good. He's sweet and not just there for that. Most guys you can tell that's all they want and when they get it, you're sometimes not even in the picture anymore.
Finally the sun starts coming up and we're giggling about something. We eventually fall asleep.

Sunday - 12pm -
NG (no more G after that incident!) and I get our act together and hit up brunch. I can't eat much, but try so he doesn't know about the night before. Then contact the rest of the group and head to the center of the city for a free concert in the park - B.G.'s!!! Too bad we can't get in and have to outside. But we made a day of it - C.J., CMG, The Spanker, NG, myself, RW + CW = impromptu picnic! Mmmm. Then we hit up a fav in Soho for outdoor beers but I'm too tired to get past 2, so me and NG leave for the train. At this point, I want to be in bed with him again, but know I can't. We kiss and part ways. When I get home, I rethink the entire weekend and the dancing w/ the ex moment is still stuck in my head.
So I write him a text: dancing in that tent with only you made me really happy. like it was our party and everyone was there for us
I did this but I'm not sure why. Maybe so he'd know what I was really thinking.... in hopes of getting an amazing response back as well.
This is what I got: That would be cool. We kind of ruled for a while. I was trying to show off. A bit.
Um...DUHHHH. Really? "THAT WOULD BE COOL". Men are fools. I left the texts at that.
But I did proceed to have a dream he confessed to me that he slept w/ a man then gave another man a blowjob that same night. I bawled my eyes out I was so hurt and upset.

Today - right now:
Nothing much but work. Chatted w/ ADHD for the first time in a week (oh yeah - he emailed me at 9:30pm on Saturday saying hi and hope I wasn't working...right.). We are officially over and apparently CW wrote him an email wasted on Friday night, asking him out for drinks... I think to talk about ADHD's false image of a man not being able to be friends w/ a woman (i love that this is coming back up).
Had taco's w/ 2 friends from work...delish. Then smoked a cigarette, bummed from Hoosey. 2 minutes into the smoke, my mouth goes numb. Damn, parliments must be strong!! She laughs and says "You got the magic cigarette!" Apparently "magic" stands for coke and it was all over my mouth. I'm not a fan of that drug, but now it's too late. Numbness of the mouth for 20 minutes. Like 100 shots of Novocaine into every nook-n-cranny of my mouth.
What a nice way to round off the night...numb mouth.

Phew...long week! But I'm home now and almost ready to sleep. Just can't wait for next weekend to begin!!