Sometimes I question my growth in Christ since I received Him in 2004. Well yesterday I read one of my old journals, starting on September 22, 2004. WOW, I no longer doubt my growth! I know now that it is IMPOSSIBLE to remain unchanged when seeking Christ.

I am by no means a perfect Christian at this point. In fact, I realize daily how much I am in need of His saving grace and could not function without it. But to look at my thought process and my life almost 3 years ago through my journals and to look at my journal entries now, it's truly amazing. There are things I struggled with, sins I freely exercised in 2004 that are not even a THOUGHT now.

Philippians 4:8 says "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things."

See, here's the thing. Non-christians that struggle with such addictions as drugs, sex, stealing, etc. may come to a point in there life where they realize it is wrong. They may even want to fix these things. Some go to rehab and some find the willpower to do it on their own. But what keeps them from relapsing? Ever since the day that Adam and Eve ate from the tree, we as humans have followed in their footsteps. We are attracted to things that we KNOW are wrong. We will always be that way. Once you are addicted to something, you will ALWAYS be an addict. I personally don't know what keeps nonbelievers from relapsing, but I know that most of them DO relapse into their sinful nature. But what I have realized in the past 3 years is that Jesus Christ is the only reason I am capable of standing her and saying that certain sins are no longer an issue for me. By doing things like reading my Bible, getting plugged into church and fellowship, and maintaining a relationship with Christ, I have grown to LOVE Him more and more. I wish I could say I fall in love with Christ daily, but I have my days. Because I love Christ, I love His Word, and I love His ways. He is the way, the truth, and the life. Thats what keeps me from relapsing. By reading his Word I have drawn closer to Him and learned His ways. I want to do things that please Him, not to make Him proud but because I am so thankful that he gave me life! I am so thankful that He gave me a way out of sin. I don't have to be tormented by my past and my sins, they are on the ocean floor.

SCARY THOUGHT: If the only thing keeping me from relapsing into my old life of sin is myself, relapse is inevitable.

PEACEFUL THOUGHT: Jesus Christ defeated my sin when He died on the cross, with eyes on Him, relapse is not likely, but even if it happens He still defeated it and I don't have to start over.