I love how the flaws i hate you find o so cute
and when we watch a movie i can see you looking at me
and i have to try so hard not to smile so you wont see i noticed
i don't get why you love me
and feel a need to wipe up every tear

And when you talk about your future you always make sure to include me
no matter how far ahead you are thinking into life

Sadly i have to admit the love i had for you died over night if it existed
i have no clue where i will find the strength to tell you
you have been hurt so much that your confidence has disappeared
and i couldn't imagine doing that to you
i pray there is a way i can get a way with not telling you

Maybe the feelings aren't gone but just well hidden
or at least thats what i hope
baby i am so sorry i left
but now i see that this wasn't enough to hold us together
no matter how hard we lie
its just going to happen now or later

I can still think back to when we met
so many years ago and we were so different
it only took me a few seconds to think of something clever to get your attention
and that was it you were mine
that quick convo with that shy boy with the curly hair
a moment permanently embedded into my head
i was not surprised at all that the next day you got my number
we talked for hours
and agreed on everything
you knew my favorite color after only a few minutes just from some chipped nail polish and a green hoodie that ironically i am wearing now almost 2 years later.
you tried so hard to protect me from so many things
but you didn't realize they had already cut my soul and made it bleed
and you were supposed to be the stitch to fix it all
the foundation to cover the scar
but stupid me i was scared
i lied
i lied to you
and ran away

i saw you after i had already moved to this place
i spoke of you like i had not known you but really you were the only person that i really knew
for the first time you spoke first
online conversations brought a lot of feelings back
and when i told you about my secret i had hid so well
afraid it would be the thing that would finally make you look at me different
but instead you said you wished you had
known when you were my bandaid
not now
that you had moved on
now that you held her so tight

your the only one that knew and knows
what killed my heart at a young age

i was here for you when she broke your heart
hoping to be a soft cushion you would lay beside you
now i wake up to texts full of words that put a smile on my face
i wait the whole day just to talk to you for a brief moment
your the only person i would wait for
and when you said i love you
i cried
and smiled so much i thought my heart was going to break
i feel my eyes get hot now that i think back
it was only this summer
and now its already over
your the only person i let affect my life at all

i can feel you touch me
and the way you grab my hand

you fill me with insperation and fuel my musical soul

Your my guilty pleasure a bad habit i just can't shake

I want to take you along
pack you away in my heart
and feel your love flow through my body

Your the only guy that can fill my eyes with water
You say exactly what i need to hear
You kiss me just enough times

your words whispered in my ear
and girly giggles fill the air

i will miss your arm around me
your fingers through my hair
your soft kiss on my neck
and your teasing tickle on my arm
the way you listened to everything i said
how my head lay perfect on your lap
the way you smiled when our eyes met
your nervous habits i loved and hated all at the same time
the way your voice changes after i say hi
how i think of you every night as if you were right next to me
and you promise me so much even though we both know
you wont make it happen

now look at me only thinking of the good times
not all those moments you filled me with pain
how many lies you told me
to just hide an addiction
so many i can't remember them all
and even now after all these years
you still lie

i just wish you would understand there is nothing wrong with you
but what can i do if the feelings just aren't there
am i supposed to lie?

or end it now
so we can both move on