The Melbourne International Comedy festival starts today. Is anyone …

The Melbourne International Comedy festival starts today. Is anyone going, and what shows are you going to catch? I'm going to Ross Noble, Dylan Moran, Stephen K Amos and Danny Bhoy.

while we're speaking on poo in melbourne. how about beggars? we were …

while we're speaking on poo in melbourne. how about beggars?
we were having breakfast at the fitz and some dude kept asking us for change and hugs, while eyeing off a twenty left on the table.
i'm really going to have to stop being polite to these people. almost every day i walk down brunswick st i get asked for money.
most of the time i'm not abused.

anyone have they favourite lines? my fall back is always, "i have nothing for you".

Oh dear God, why didn't someone tell me it was football season?? Not …

Oh dear God, why didn't someone tell me it was football season??

Not that I have anything against the game, but I live on Hoddle St, and frequently have to drive down Punt Rd, and I'm never mentally prepared for the hoards of fans leaving the MCG, mostly drunk, kicking footballs to each other (read: into the sides of cars as they stagger across the road between traffic)...

I love Melbourne.