as you may know, I'm a wordsmith and ever so graceful in the delivery. the proof is in the puddin so let me whip some up for you.

yesterday at work, within a matter of 30 mins I said three things that could create some premium awkwardness.

"as long as you wipe"-referring to cleaning rooms and not using lysol but using clorox wipes.

"wake and bake"-automatic reaction to a co-worker talking about going home and cooking with their momma.

"you saw my pickle"-I was in a pickle trying to dump trash from a trash can into a bag and someone helped me.

right, right? J-E-L-L-O.

I'm a regular poet. what can I say.