I've been reading Fountainhead and I don't like it

Ellsworth Toohey: "Just why are you unhappy my dear?"
Catherine:"I don't know. I can't understand it. For instance, it was I who arranged to have the classes in prenatal care down at the Clifford House-it was my idea-I raised the money-I found the teacher. The classes are doing very well. I tell myself that I should be happy about it. But I'm not. It doesn't seem to make any difference to me. I sit down and I tell myself: It was you who arranged to have Marie Gonzales' baby adopted into a nice family-now, be happy. But I'm not. I feel nothing. When I'm honest with myself, I know that the only emotion I've felt for years is being tired. Not physically tired. Just tired. It's as if...as if there were nobody there to feel any more."

Enoch