God...how long has it been since I've gotten one of these posted...for the three of you who read this...I'm so sorry.

I would not say that I am an "avid" Coldplay fan...but I do enjoy their music. Especially when I'm in this weird mood of feeling somewhat motivated to be artistic and try and create something. There is just an element to their song writing that really has the ability to foster some thought. Which is really where the thought for this blog got rolling around in my head. I love the line from "The Scientist"..."nobody said it was easy, nobody said it was easy"

Nobody said it was easy.

Not one person ever who had any real knowledge or intellect about life said..."aw. i got this...damn...this is a cake-walk!" I mean really...who in their right mind would have the balls to come out and be like "oh my gosh...my life is just like so easy...i've got everything figured out!!!" (If you happen to be one of those people, please feel free anytime to get off your damn high-horse and start explaining to the rest of us, why for some reason you're so enlightened and the rest of us have not yet grasped the secret nature of figuring out this shitstorm called "life") Let's be honest...life is a royal pain in the ass...not sometime...most of the time. The reality is that most of us, for most of our lives are going to struggle with this sunrise-to-sunset, 8-hour work day, filled with the curve-balls of life. Some examples...

Today at work...a coworker promptly informed us "I have to leave, Ken was in an accident and they're towing the car...I have to go pick him up." Thankfully the accident was not a life-threatening deal...apparently Ken was a little banged up...but the reality is that now this family has to deal with several bills, potential fines and tickets should they be found liable, and any medical costs that come about from this.

Or how about this...another co-worker was leaving the other day and in the course of our polite office banter, she says, "my friend is getting checked out on Monday to see if the cancer's come back...she's 36." WHAT? Not only is it bad enough to contract cancer at 36...but for a second time. This example is great because it shows the connectiveness of humanity. Now my work associate is not the one with cancer, her friend is. Yet she is still feeling the effects of a life that demands us move beyond the shallow, mindless, movement that suppresses all the hurt and pain we endure.

One more work example. Yesterday, a supervisor of mine rushed out the door. I had no idea what was going on. Until about 5 minutes later when an associate of ours came and told me she would be assuming our exiting partner's responsibilities for the next couple of days...because our co-worker received the news her father was in the hospital and probably not going to make it.

Life is a bitch sometimes.

Look people. We are not going to escape this life. We try in so many ways. Alcohol. Sex. Drug abuse. Suicide. But the reality is that when we resign ourselves to these selfish coping mechanisms we just make the problem worse. I remember once, I was really down (like that's any surprise!) This particular night I was being especially pessimistic and nihilistic and doing the who emotional "i don't want to go on....my life sucks...i hate life." (yeah...I'm a whiny little punk!) Anyways, it happened that this night some friends came into the coffee shop. One of them was my friend Lindsay, who I knew through a mutual companion. Now, up to this point I definitely considered Lindsay my friend...but we hadn't really hung-out up to this point. But this particular night, Lindsay won a spot on very close to the top of the "best friends ever list." This is why I love this girl. She observed my demeanor that evening and through the process of asking (as only she could) "what the fuck is wrong with you." I launched into some diatribe about the pointlessness of life, and how incredibly horrible it was, and how I just wanted it all to end...blah, blah, blah. This is the most firm I think anyone ever got with me. In front of everybody there (and rather loudly) she looked me in the eye and said, "don't you dare be that fucking selfish. You want to be that fucking selfish and I will tie the noose for you and then kick the fucking chair out from your feet. MY FRIENDS DON'T DO THAT SHIT!" That was one moment in my life, that now as I look back I realize how much our generation keeps looking for very selfish ways not to deal with a screwed up world.

To my generation...we are probably one of the most selfish and apathetic eras ever! (and I've stood right on the front lines.) Seriously. We are a generation that has so much luxury that we can afford to drown out the cries of dying world and focus on our own selfish message of "i'm just fucking giving up!" Look. LIFE IS HARD! I'll be the first to admit that my life is a life that I feel like I'm constantly crawling on my hands and my knees, crying and swearing, being a little bitch and wanting to just say "fuck it all...I'm done!" But I can't. And here's why.

Because of people like Lindsay. She took the time out of her life to inject hope into my heart.

Because of people like my co-worker. Who take the time to care for her friend.

People...we instinctively know that we are wired to love. We are designed to care for each other and this world. We all have it in us. At some point...ultimately...you know it. I don't care how hard you claim you are...how much you claim that love doesn't exist...it does. The problem is that we think of love differently than we should. You see ultimately love is about the complete sacrifice for another. True, honest, pure love has no expectations of return. This is why films and literature and art that express someone who dies for a cause or a person that doesn't deserve that death, ultimately bring us to tears. (Or give us those little shivers and goosebumps.)

Here's the thing...we can be a part of that beautiful story.

My friend Kali is 16 and she would be the first to admit that life can suck balls sometimes. The other day she told me that she just started a group that meets at school whose specific purpose is to raise awareness about the genocide in Darfur and find ways to help bring an end to that destruction. SIXTEEN YEARS OLD! And she is stepping out of her own life for a second and saying, "i'm going to make a difference." How freak'n powerful can that be? It's not easy...but it is simple!

This is something Mother Teresa once said, "I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love."

How crazy is that. There is actually a book that just recently came out documenting different letters and journals from Mother Teresa that exposed how much this woman struggled with her life, both physically and spiritually. The point is she didn't stop. She kept moving forward. She kept loving...even when it hurt. Because it wasn't about her.

Nobody said it would be easy...not my friend Lindsay or any of the other people in my life that have seen me be a completely selfish little child.

But there is hope.

There is love.

It hurts to love.

But love ultimately brings us hope.

much love.