I'm trying as hard as I can to not talk about wedding stuff contantly. I think I'm doing a decent job. It's just that everything I've read seems to claim that if you don't have every single detail taken care of a year in advance, you're doomed and you won't have a dress or a cake or a location or a photographer and you'll die sad and alone. And I find that incredibly sensationalist and idiotic, and I'm trying to strike a good balance between bringing it up at every opportunity and ignoring it, hoping it'll plan itself.

Did you know that between inviting only immediate family, plus aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents, we are already pushing 75 guests? That is a lot of people. I honestly have no idea how big this shindig will end up being. We'd like a small-ish wedding, but one that includes our closest family and friends. I'd really rather not invite those people my parents have known forever but with whom I'm not especially close to, but inevitably they will have invited my parents to their kids' weddings and I know I'm going to feel obligated. Argh. Will do my best to avoid that.

The one thing neither of us is willing to budge on is having a non-religious ceremony. I am not going to stand in front of hundreds of people and lie to all of them. Not going to do it. I would much rather have a Justice of the Peace officiate the ceremony and be able to be perfectly honest in front of everyone I love. That's probably hard for some people to deal with (namely my grandparents, who are all good, church-going people), and I know I will catch a lot of flak from my family about it, but I can't do it. I'm not willing to compromise on that.

As far as other details, for colors I'm thinking a nice, springy green would be just lovely. Actually, I saw these decorations somewhere (can't for the life of me think of where, but I'm pretty sure it was a wedding website) and I FELL IN LOVE WITH THEM and I think I might insist on having something like this:

They're just so... fresh! And natural! I love that the two middle ones look suspiciously like broccoli. Hee. I figure by going this route, we'll probably save money on flowers too - how expensive can broccoli be? Just kidding. But I do think these sorts of foliage would be cheaper than importing some rare, exotic orchid from Hawaii. Also? My family is incredibly handy and I am sure they have a birch tree lying about the place somewhere that we could repurpose for decorations.

Are books helpful in planning weddings? I am feeling a bit lost at the moment. I don't have opinions about much of anything yet, especially anything involving dresses. I just know that I don't want something skanky or partially see-through (YES I HAVE SEEN THEM and they are BAD) and I don't understand why all dresses are strapless. I love strapless dresses, personally, and I think they look very nice, but I am afraid I will look like I am made entirely of boobs and also? Can you imagine trying to find a dress that will fit me? I nearly have nightmares about it. My mom made her own wedding dress and I am seriously considering having her make mine as well just to avoid the horrors of trying on mass-produced dresses that will inevitably be three feet too long.

GAH. Thank you for indulging me. I haven't really talked to anybody about my plans because 1) I don't want to be THAT GIRL who thinks everyone is just dying to hear about her wedding plans when really, no one is; and 2) I feel pretentious. Of course, I also feel pretentious saying "fianc