alixi chanèl.

death in the garden, blood on the flowers.

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 20:45:55 -0800

death in the garden, blood on the flowers.

ayn rand. "The controversial philosophy of Objectivism, as created by Ayn Rand, is deeply rooted - though unconsciously - in contemporary American society."

Sun, 22 Feb 2009 16:52:57 -0800

The controversial philosophy of Objectivism, as created by Ayn Rand, is deeply rooted - though unconsciously - in contemporary American society. Objectivism, since its inception in the mid 1940s, has always been a topic of interest amongst intellectual circles. Hotly debated, one will find that sides are passionately divided; you’re either a staunch advocate, or detest the very notion of Objectivism. Strongly supporting a pure, uncontrolled, laissez - faire Capitalist system, the use of reason and intellect over baseless emotion, and striking down the concepts of religion and social programs, Objectivism makes no apologies for it’s “sole pursuit of happiness and well being,” (Wolf, 12), and strive for personal gain, which could be argued, at the expense of the weaker ones in society. Rand states that her philosophy is, “…in essence, the concept of man as a heroic being, with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with product achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute.” (Atlas Shrugged) Rand took these ideals from her home country of Russia, where she was born on February 2, 1905, in St. Petersburg. An outspoken and intelligent child, Rand reviled against the mysticism and quasi-communist traditions of her culture, speaking out against the Russian Orthodox Catholic church. She sought the individual freedoms that she believed were being denied to the people of Russia, that would appear many years later in her works. Born into a tremulous time in Russian history, during her high school years, Rand experienced firsthand both the Kerensky Revolution (which she supported) and the Bolshevik Revolution, in 1917, which destroyed the rule of the Czars, and created the Soviet Union (which she grossly opposed.). In 1925 she was granted permission to leave the Soviet Union and travel to the United States, which she considered to be “the pinnacle of advanced civilization.” The stark contrast between the USSR and the USA led her to write Anthem (1938), her first novel, which dramatized a complete collective state. With the publication of Anthem, Rand began forming her unique philosophy of Objectivism, which would encompass her later novels, The Fountainhead (1943), and her masterpiece, Atlas Shrugged (1957). In order for Rand’s theory of Objectivism to fit the mold of ‘philosophy’, it had to fit the standing criteria, which is, “ Philosophy is the subject that studies man’s relationship to reality.” (Rand, 156) It has five levels: Metaphysics, which concerns one’s reality and position in it, Epistemology, deals with the accumulation of knowledge, Ethics, the rights and wrongs of reality, Politics, which studies the proper role of government, and finally Aesthetics, the studying, critiquing, and appreciation of art. Briefly, in Objectivism, the Metaphysics are simple: “Existence exists, existence is reality, and consciousness exists.” (Rand, 58). Quite simply, what you see is what you get. The Epistemology can be based down to one word: reason. “Existence is identity: knowledge is reason.”(Rand 59). From this, comes the rejection of religion, and the discrediting of feeling. Essentially, there’s no absolute knowledge behind it, so therefore, it cannot be valid, through way of reason. In the Ethics of Objectivism (or as some say, “Rational Self-Interest”), Rand states that humans are conscious beings, the motivation to live is experienced as chasing a conscious state - the pursuit of happiness. We chase what makes us happy. (Which, regardless of your philosophy, everyone will agree.) But Objectivism takes it further and presents that states of mind (such as happiness) are not primal, they are merely feelings set forth by “specific facts of existence“. As a result, humans need a set standard, grounded in reality, to help them pursue their desires. The ‘Politics’ side is very plain: individual freedoms must reign supreme. Objectivism is very direct on the issue of liberties. People are free to live their lives as they wish, without government interference, be it smoking marijuana or indulging in homosexual behavior, that is up to the discretion of the individual. Rand however, was extremely clear that a human may not use force (physical or otherwise) or coercion against another. Each being must be allowed to make their own choices, without the intrusion of others. Rand went a step further, and included the benefits and gains of a Capitalist system. “Capitalism,” she argued,” recognizes and defends reason as man’s sole means of survival. In a Capitalist society, goods and services are distributed by consensual trade, not physical coercion…Capitalism is the only system compatible with human life.” (Rand, 26). Finally, the Aesthetics. Objectivism describes art as, “a selective recreation of reality, according to an artists metaphysical value-judgments.” (Rand, 64) Rand felt that art was an successful way to convey a moral. It must propose a way that humans “ought to be,” in a rational and non emotional style. Rand’s Objectivism, needless to say, has sparked countless debates. One of the most renowned Anti-Objectivists is Franklin Harris, an author who routinely speaks out against the teachings of Ayn Rand. In his essay, “Down With Randian Warmongers!,” Harris speaks out against the “fatally flawed” Objectivist stance on possible war with China. He writes, “In a bloodthirsty press release Andrew Lewis, one of the nonentities on the ARI (Ayn Rand Institute) payroll, writes: "China is the guilty party. The fact that China poses a military danger to America is what makes our surveillance missions necessary. It is China’s status as a potential aggressor that created the perilous situation in the first place…" This is the sort of loopy reasoning we used to get from Rand herself, like when she hilariously declared big business America’s "persecuted minority." China is no threat to the United States, and it won’t be one for several decades, if ever. Like all authoritarian countries, China is a threat to its own people, but the only international threat on the scene today is the United States. Western democracies, somewhat restrained from killing their own citizens, are the countries forced to sate their bloodlust abroad. It isn’t China, after all, that goes around dropping bombs on any country that dares defy the U.S. State Department. China didn’t wage an air campaign on behalf of the Marxist Kosovo Liberation Army; we did. They didn’t bomb our embassy in Yugoslavia, but we did bomb theirs…” He continues on, stating that the Randian, or Objectivist philosophy essentially crumbles within itself, do to the lack of infrastructure and foresight. “It’s just a nice, little work of fiction. And that‘s all.” he writes, referring to the fact that Rand chose to portray her ideals in fiction form. (The Fountinhead and Atlas Shrugged.) And Christoper Wolf, in his book, “What’s Really Wrong With Objectivism?” writes that it is morally evil to impose psychology onto the world of philosophy, as Rand openly admitted doing. He writes, “The concepts of 'evil,' 'evasion,' and 'inherently dishonest ideas' are psychological concepts that do not belong in philosophy. These concepts merely serve to give Objectivists unrestricted license to morally condemn other human beings. .. The power of moral judgment is enormous. The power to pronounce someone as an evil evader is the greatest power of all. By making such power available, subject only to whim, with no objective facts or principles to restrain it, Ayn Rand has unleashed a reign of intellectual terrorism. She has transformed many honest, well-meaning individuals into unjust dogmatic moralizers…Just as the valid parts of the philosophy of Aristotle have survived, so will much of the philosophy of Ayn Rand. But just as we have discarded Aristotle's ethical concept of the 'virtuous Athenian', so should Ayn Rand's psychological concepts of 'evil,' 'evasion,' and 'inherently dishonest ideas' be discarded. Rand's attempt to mix psychology with philosophy should be relegated to the status of historical footnotes.” The battle over Objectivism is haggard, with both sides fighting passionately. But regardless of what you believe, there are obvious signs of Objectivism in American society today. The pursuit of happiness, the rational reasoning, the capitalist economy, even, sadly, the “self first, others last” mindset, are all twining together, whether we like it or not. We are on the brink of an Objectivist system. Rand stated that her theory was “a philosophy for living on earth.” It is a philosophy that can very easily snowball into an elitist nation, letting the rich get richer, and the poor get poorer. Only, in Objectivism, no one would be there to catch the ones falling through the cracks. Ayn Rand said, “Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life.” Contemporary America is following, headfirst, and they don’t even realize it.

once upon a time you dressed so fine, threw a bum a dime, in your prime,...

Sat, 21 Feb 2009 08:13:46 -0800

once upon a time you dressed so fine, threw a bum a dime, in your prime, diiiidn't you?!

my candle burns at both ends; it will not last the night; but, ah, my ...

Fri, 20 Feb 2009 18:33:17 -0800

my candle burns at both ends;
it will not last the night;
but, ah, my foes, and oh, my friends--
it gives such lovely light!

- edna st. vincent millay.

you must not fear death, my lads; defy him, and you drive him into ...

Fri, 20 Feb 2009 18:31:56 -0800

you must not fear death, my lads; defy him, and you drive him into the enemy's ranks.
- napoleon bonaparte.

trying to figure this out. :S

Fri, 20 Feb 2009 17:51:48 -0800

trying to figure this out. :S

n763025595_5702064_216

Sat, 07 Feb 2009 16:44:55 -0800

double bleh.

Sat, 20 Sep 2008 19:23:04 -0700

101_4411

Mon, 04 Aug 2008 00:22:33 -0700

chaos.

Sat, 31 Jan 2009 01:22:00 -0800

walking. walking. walking. this bog is endless. the oppressive, humid atmosphere seems a tad metaphoric. a stark, unyielding yellow sun throbs relentlessly. the..stank of a thousand petrified bodies like john daily. who refused to pay his gambling debts and had his skull smashed in with a brick and was thrown in the bog, 87 years ago. or jasmine (last name unknown) born 'in the year of our lord' eighteen hundred and twenty-one. a slave girl, servin' the massa - in more ways than one. a jealous wife is a deadly enemy. smothered beneath layers of peat, rises and assaults your senses. walking. walking. walking. the flies, drawn by the sweet scent of sweat, land on your soaking face. you feel them. sticking to your eyes, your nose. your mouth. swarming, biting, shitting. laying eggs. frantically brushing them aside, your arms ache - a repetitive motion. hours. revulsion chokes your mind, sending shivers of disgust down your spinal column. sobbing. your feet. retreating for days, in ankle-deep water [reminiscent of vietnam] would have been simpler. the squelch envelops your footsteps - you've lost your shoes long ago. covered in muck and manky, stagnant water. push down. sink in. heave. repeat. you are run-down. sobbing. sobbing. sobbing. mind, body, will, all at the breaking point. to the left - nothing. to the back - nothing. thefrontupdownright - nothing! a dawning realisation: "complete isolation." this chills you to your very core. you begin to run. scrambling, racing, collapsing, only splashing and your gasping moans can be heard. snap. and suddenly you are surrounded. encircled by ten diseased, emaciated, snarling wolves grrrrrrrrrrowling low in their throats, salivating at your frantic form. their fur is matted and ragged; oozing, pus-filled sores cover their hides. they want you. the alpha, her eyes boring into your very soul, advances towards you. slowly. savoring. taking her time. you cannot look away. with a snarl of pure instinct, she commands her legion, the undisputed leader. you cower in the filth, unable to think, to move. watch her eyes. watching. watching. watching. a leap, followed by nine, growling savagely, knock you back, tearing at your mangled limbs. you're beyond feeling. exhaustion is over, panic, no more. her eyes! the eyes... ................th..e....e...y...es..

new. untitled, yet again.

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 09:20:43 -0800

fulfillment is like an ever-elusive thought. it swifts and darts between every crevice and opening- when you desperately crave its stillness. it slicks and slides between every good chance that passes you by always just beyond your reach. inches out of your grasp. the pied piper is calling. fingers clutching madly, scraping, scrambling to keep the grip while it's mocking, jeering, dancing wildly, reveling in your despair. until that day. when it's too late. and the desire has died- slowly suffocated by the weight of constant shortcomings. when you're old, and decrepit, and ill- it will look in your window. instant recognition! in one moment, the desire is rekindled! one second, and the old, forgotten fervor returns. delusions of grandeur and still frames of success flood your feeble brain. but it will smile. [a smirking sneer] and wave at your bedridden form. and keep walking onward. away from you. away from your dreams. into its blissful eternity forever. and the old, overwhelming pains of failure return. sleep.

[untitled.]

Sat, 20 Sep 2008 19:46:41 -0700

the natural ebb and flow of the water is interrupted. broken-------as amongst rocks. displaying for all eyes to gaze upon in horror in fear [admiration] (beat) the beast within. it rises from the depths, a solitarysoldier [solitarysoldier], spear in hand, facing. it is one with the Mother. Spear, nearly as old as himself, has seen countless battles. pitted with age, it's still as strong as when first forged. fires of hell and the coolness of heaven combined, for one glorious moment to make passion. together they were unstoppable [the Powers that be] worshiped. called upon in times of turmoil and war. given offerings of roasted lamb and berries, if only, only, they would acknowledge. thy will was done. now. they rot. relics, from a time long deceased. the homage has died, the offerings no more. it is simply alone. forgotten. abandoned. with bones of granite, crrrrreaking with age && water, from the womb of it's berth, cascading down its body eyes of the sea. swirling bluegrey, with flecks of orange, hiding confusion. [panic] facading a formidable will. now only the illusion of past grandeur. it does not like to be forgotten.

....[there are no words.]

Mon, 15 Sep 2008 19:41:27 -0700

he wrote this for me. oooooh, my heart feels as if it's going to explode! Its in the air in your eyes tangled without a care our legs entwined I meant every word I said its up to you to believe I know where you have been led and the ways they try to deceive I'll never let them hurt you never again I will be yours and you will be mine we could lay here forever and that would be just fine

bahaha!! ohhh, boyfrannn..

Mon, 01 Sep 2008 14:37:50 -0700

"i figured out how we can get the house to ourselves" alixi: oh really? do tell me this news. "well, if mum was going anywhere, we would leave at the same time she was, say we were going somewhere, then come back after she left. i would either leave the back door open or take a key then have to turn the alarm off and all that, but i know the password, so that would be easy. after that the house is ours." alixi: ....AHAHAHAHAA!! "ahah! and that's not even the hard part. the hard part will be figuring out what to say if she comes home early. ................which i have planned out too." alixi: (still laughing) "aha! stop laughing! there's a detector in my driveway that sounds if a car is coming up. but it doesn't always work. BUT HOPEFULLY it does so we have a little bit of a head start. but if it sounds whatever's going on has to stop, you run downstairs, wait in the living room look very innocent, and i'll just pretend like i left something in my room and went to go get it." alixi: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA!! "ahahah, does that mean you like it?" (ohMAHN! i adore him. i really really really do. ahahahaaaaaa :D)

this makes me cry.

Sat, 16 Aug 2008 16:23:14 -0700

Congratulations! Today is your day. You're off to Great Places! You're off and away! You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go. You'll look up and down streets. Look 'em over with care. About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there." With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street. And you may not find any you'll want to go down. In that case, of course, you'll head straight out of town. It's opener there in the wide open air. Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you. And when things start to happen, don't worry. Don't stew. Just go right along. You'll start happening too. OH! THE PLACES YOU'LL GO! You'll be on your way up! You'll be seeing great sights! You'll join the high fliers who soar to high heights. You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed. You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top all the rest. Except when you don' t Because, sometimes, you won't. I'm sorry to say so but, sadly, it's true and Hang-ups can happen to you. You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You'll be left in a Lurch. You'll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump. And the chances are, then, that you'll be in a Slump. And when you're in a Slump, you're not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done. You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're darked. A place you could sprain both you elbow and chin! Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win? And IF you go in, should you turn left or right... or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite? Or go around back and sneak in from behind? Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find, for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind. You can get so confused that you'll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place. The Waiting Place... ...for people just waiting. Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or a No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting. Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a sting of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting. NO! That's not for you! Somehow you'll escape all that waiting and staying. You'll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you'll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you're that kind of a guy! Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. there are games to be won. And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all. Fame! You'll be famous as famous can be, with the whole wide world watching you win on TV. Except when they don't. Because, sometimes, they won't. I'm afraid that some times you'll play lonely games too. Games you can't win 'cause you'll play against you. All Alone! Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you'll be quite a lot. And when you're alone, there's a very good chance you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won't want to go on. But on you will go though the weather be foul On you will go though your enemies prowl On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike and I know you'll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are. You'll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You'll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life's a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and 3 / 4 percent guaranteed.) KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS! So... be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea, you're off to Great Places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So...get on your way!

the petition to revoke the independence of the united states of america.

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 18:22:41 -0700

i joined this group on facebook and this was their group summary. i actually fell out of my chair laughing. :D To the citizens of the United States of America, in the light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new Prime Minister (The Right Honourable Gordon Brown MP, for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a Minister for America without the need for further elections. The House of Representatives and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect: 1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium." Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour'; skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced 'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix "ise." You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra' e.g. Edinburgh. You are welcome to re-spell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary." Using the same thirty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "uhh", "like", and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed." There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary, then you won't have to use bad language as often. 2. There is no such thing as "US English." We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize." 3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents --- Scottish dramas such as "Taggart" will no longer be broadcast with subtitles. While we're talking about regions, you must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is "Devon." If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become "shires" e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire. 4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to play English characters. British sit-coms such as "Men Behaving Badly" or "Red Dwarf" will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American audience who can't cope with the humour of occasional political incorrectness. Popular British films such as the Italian Job and the Wicker Man should never be remade. 5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through. 6. You should stop playing American "football." There are other types of football such as Rugby, Aussie Rules & Gaelic football. However proper football - which will no longer be known as soccer, is the best known, most loved and most popular. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US Rugby sevens side by 2010. You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of North America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called "rounders," which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs. 7. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public. 8. The 4th of July is no longer a public holiday. The 2nd of November will be a new national holiday, but only in Britain. It will be called "Indecisive Day." 9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap, and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour. 10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call 'French fries' are not real chips. Fries aren't even French, they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers. 11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself. 12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling "beer" is not actually beer at all, it is lager . From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer," and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as "Lager." The substances formerly known as "American Beer" will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine," with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as "Weak Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine." This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in the Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion. 13. From the 10th of November the UK will harmonise petrol (or "gasoline," as you will be permitted to keep calling it until the 1st of April) prices with the former USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices (roughly $10/US gallon -- get used to it). 14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun. 15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy. 16. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776). Thank you for your co-operation

untitled 34.

Sat, 09 Aug 2008 16:11:08 -0700

life. everyday doorstops chainlink fences the wall. coffee home sex the routine. [what routine?] the one that rules your life. they say, routine is the one thing that can get you [killed] it's killin' me. the nurse: "Well, as we see here, Miss, you have a tumour. It's slowly taking over your mind. Just go home and live a normal life." the newsanchor: "I had me a show once. Isa gone now. Ima 'not what they're lookin' fer.' " oh, really? i appreciate your concern. as i sit here coloursfade//wordsslur//mindjumbles-- he comes. with it's southern, sickly drawl. imagine..cowboy boots. "why hello, ma'am." insidious. [careful. caution!].. "take my hand. I'll make it ....a.ll...better." whirlingdirvishesmindspinningfasterfasterFASTER- IT'S COMING! It'S COMIng....shhhh. pure...............................escasty. (beat) "miss?" what? routine? sounds familiar.. oh god, ROUTINE! my life! what the hell? I have to get out! "why....hello, ma'am." oh no. it's back. the grin. holding secrets telling lies false comfort as i wait patiently for my life to begin.

uni. [ohgod, uni!] :O

Fri, 08 Aug 2008 18:12:36 -0700

HA! so, i was wiggin' out about uni so i decided to email all the unis that i want to go to. university of surrey london met uni [MY LOVE!! *sob sob*] manchester uni you know, to calm my nerves a wee bit. and i just read them back over and they sounded "very intelligent but a bit desperate" as my dearest dan said. ahahaha, i was frantic. well. we'll see what happens. fuck fuck fuckety fuck..

lower class brats.

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 16:56:16 -0700

i bloody love these lyrics. "barbie dolls" - lower class brats. your image of beauty is a bit askew brainwashing girls from the age of two you airbrushed playmates don't turn me on with collagen lips and silicone tear, tear the heads tear the heads off barbie dolls i would hate to have your plastic smile all dressed up in the latest style my dream girl ain't all satin and lace shes a natural born angel with a dirty face

charles bukowski.

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 02:29:00 -0700

thanks, mate. you know who you are. [: the genius of the crowd - charles bukowski "there is enough treachery, hatred violence absurdity in the average human being to supply any given army on any given day and the best at murder are those who preach against it and the best at hate are those who preach love and the best at war finally are those who preach peace beware the average man the average woman beware their love, their love is average seeks average but there is genius in their hatred there is enough genius in their hatred to kill you to kill anybody not wanting solitude not understanding solitude they will attempt to destroy anything that differs from their own not being able to create art they will not understand art they will consider their failure as creators only as a failure of the world not being able to love fully they will believe your love incomplete and then they will hate you and their hatred will be perfect like a shining diamond like a knife like a mountain like a tiger like hemlock their finest art"