Posts
NovemberNov 10 Tuesday 09
A kite drifted through the sky and into her living room. Stapled to the kite was a kitten. Tuesdays kept getting better and better and best.
updated Nov 10, 2009 via Twitter
NovemberNov 7 Saturday 09
The zombies were winning. It didn't seem possible, but the girl zombie could clearly bake the meanest butter tart known to the living.
updated Nov 7, 2009 via Twitter
NovemberNov 5 Thursday 09
She watched her own reflection in the mirror, stroking her illustrious beard, mocking her husband, whose face was bald and cold.
updated Nov 5, 2009 via Twitter
NovemberNov 2 Monday 09
In an act of desperation, the robots elected Charlie as their leader. Charlie was made of styrofoam & melted after only a few hours.
updated Nov 2, 2009 via Twitter
NovemberNov 1 Sunday 09
The air was rich with November. He filled his nostrils, reaching for his razor. Yes, robots shave. Yes, robots have nostrils. #whiskerino
updated Nov 1, 2009 via Twitter
On the day after the big event, he sat in his closet and built a robot out of fun sized candy bars. The robot demanded bacon & fancy pants.
updated Nov 1, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 30 Friday 09
"Frorow Friaay" he said, his mouth full of tongue. Not his tongue, of course. He wiped his zombie mouth with his zombie sleeve & took a nap.
updated Oct 30, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 29 Thursday 09
The pies were delicious. Sally Wibberstobby ate 47 of them, taking short breaths between each bite. She named them names like Yek, Erb, & V.
updated Oct 29, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 27 Tuesday 09
She lifted the kitten above her head, wondering how it would taste with butter. It was Tuesday. She loved butter. A lot. #kittentuesday
updated Oct 27, 2009 via Twitter
Hundreds of robots attacked the metropolis, turning the buildings into various breakfast foods. The girl watched, snacking on some toast.
updated Oct 27, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 23 Friday 09
He swished the liquid around his mouth, spitting it into the sink. "That's not toothpaste," he said. "Nope. PIxie urine," she replied. "Oh."
updated Oct 23, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 20 Tuesday 09
He opened the box, finding a shiny new version of Windows 7. He spent the rest of the night crying & drinking & shaving other people's pets.
updated Oct 20, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 19 Monday 09
"You are the brightest kitten in the sea," she said to a bag of trash, floating in a puddle. Somewhere, a robot cried, melting the earth.
updated Oct 19, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 18 Sunday 09
A chatty fish stick sat at a bar pondering the nuclear sciences, inflatable swords, & herbivores. The bartender ended his day with a snack.
updated Oct 18, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 16 Friday 09
Fridays at the unicorn farm were always the same: collect the milk, shave the horns, tweet as someone infamous, eat dinner with the pixies.
updated Oct 16, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 15 Thursday 09
A cloud of bees, dense and plague-like, covered the sky, raining down stingers and pollen. Elsewhere, a bear was cooking salmon on a grill.
updated Oct 15, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 13 Tuesday 09
"I don't know what I just put in my mouth," she said, her finger back in the container for a 2nd dip. "Tastes like fish or kittens or glue."
updated Oct 13, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 12 Monday 09
Music didn't exist in the Land Where Music Didn't Exist, which is why she cooked a lot of eggs in her spare time. She also hated Mondays.
updated Oct 12, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 10 Saturday 09
The magic bag came in handy this afternoon as he sneaked a burrito into the movie theater. Next time, tacos. And chips & salsa. And a Coke.
updated Oct 10, 2009 via Twitter
OctoberOct 9 Friday 09
After years of animosity, his plan was finally realized. He poised his finger over the shiny, red button. "Take that, moon," he whispered.
updated Oct 9, 2009 via Twitter