I was driving down the road at lunch this week when I saw a very familiar sight: surveyors.

Before you could say "Magellan", my over-active and under-sanctified imagination went into OVERDRIVE.

I mean, just what are these guys measuring? Seriously. Dude, get on Google Earth and save yourself some time.

Are colleges are still graduating people with degrees in cartography? There can't be many more things that need to be mapped. Without question, this has forced people with graduate degrees in, like, Toponymy (or whatever) into the menial job of aiming a device at an even more menial guy down the street.

Speaking of which, who is the surveyor sidekick? His main job seems to be walking further away from the surveyor and getting waved back into a straight line of sight. Seriously? ("In the event that the surveyor cannot complete his duties . . .")

The answer has to be simple: our continent is disintegrating. The government knows it and doesn't want to alarm their citizens. They have strewn thousands of anonymous measurers throughout this land of ours to keep them appraised of the situation.

So, maybe instead of throwing out an unhelpful comment their way, you could be a little more understanding and give them some support, as they attempt to salvage all life on this planet as we know it.