Recent Blog Posts
Climbing Party
post a comment | posted Jul 23
Originally posted at Motherfuton
I've always wanted to be a member of a climbing party. You know, a group of folks who climb up some big ol hill where it's real cold and windy, but still extremely hot because you're so close to the motherfuton sun and you ea...
Guts
post a comment | posted Jul 2
Originally posted at Motherfuton
I think an under-used phrase is, "I hate your guts". That phrase used to be the rage in 4th and 5th grade. I can't remember a day going by without using it on my sister. These days, I guess the whole "negative connotation" part of it...
Winner
post a comment | posted Jun 23
Originally posted at Motherfuton
In order to be a winner, you have to think like a winner. I can think of no better place to start than by legally changing your name to Winner. This projects to others that you are in fact, a winner. I began this process myself, changing ...
Not-So-Recent Blog Posts
NBA Conspiracy
post a comment | posted Jun 11
Originally posted at Motherfuton
This particular event detailed below boiled my blood for a good two years. I knew it was a conspiracy; so it comes to light.
"In one of several allegations of corrupt refereeing, Donaghy said he learned in May 2002 that two referees known ...
Buckaroo
post a comment | posted Jun 11
Originally posted at Motherfuton
God honest truth.
Wife: Hey buckaroo, you ready to go?
Son: Hey fuckaroo.
Wife: What did you say?
Son: Well, sometimes I'll say buckaroo, then other times I'll say fuckaroo.
Wife: No, no, we don't say that word, ever.
Son: We...
Hand Model
post a comment | posted Jun 3
Originally posted at Motherfuton
I'm not positive, but I'm about 93, 94 percent sure I'd have made a great hand model if it weren't for that time at church camp where a crazy kid with a knife stabbed me in the hand, effectively ruining all chances of ach...
Minty Fresh
post a comment | posted Apr 16
Originally posted at Motherfuton
You know that feeling, that taste in your mouth, after you've brushed your teeth. That minty fresh feeling? The one that you think about right before you take a sip of OJ and realize this is gonna suck futons b/c there is nothing wors...
Brilliant
post a comment | posted Apr 15
Originally posted at Motherfuton
Experts expect big California earthquake by 2037. In other news, cover-your-ass underwear is sold out for the next 29 years.
Failed Slogans
post a comment | posted Apr 8
Originally posted at Motherfuton
Gibson Robot Guitar - For people with no hands.
Gibson Robot Guitar - A four thousand dollar tuner.
Gibson Robot Guitar - The only thing you need to look like a complete tool.
If Auto Mechanics Were Web Developers
post a comment | posted Apr 2
Originally posted at Motherfuton
Sometimes, I wish I was a rock star. Not like a leather chaps, arse hanging out rock star, but more like a "He wrote that song too?!" rock star. And also, sometimes, I think that auto mechanics would want to be web developers. I imagine c...