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September 2009

SeptemberSep 25 Friday 09

If at first you don't succeed, "forcibly touch" a bitch.

updated Sep 25, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 24 Thursday 09

#phrasesihate #beforesex #duringsex #aftersex "Don't cum inside me." "Condoms are on my dresser." "I don't do anal." and "I'm pregnant."

updated Sep 24, 2009 via Twitter

An experimental AIDS vaccine protects 1/3 of trial volunteers. The other 2/3 practice the "scratch & sniff" test and don't worry about it.

updated Sep 24, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 22 Tuesday 09

I just realized what a sexy name "redbox" is.

updated Sep 22, 2009 via Twitter

I've met my fourth bipolar chick. I hear you win a prize at five, and I'm going to write a survival guide if I make it to ten.

updated Sep 22, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 21 Monday 09

Clarity is for pussies.

updated Sep 21, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 16 Wednesday 09

I'm watching the VMAs on fast-forward, yet somehow I still feel 10 years behind.

updated Sep 16, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 10 Thursday 09

Irrefutable Fact number 907: iTunes sucks cock.

updated Sep 10, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 9 Wednesday 09

If all you need is love. Explain boners.

updated Sep 9, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 7 Monday 09

When you go to the grocery store for beer and cigarettes, does that still count as grocery shopping?

updated Sep 7, 2009 via Twitter

SeptemberSep 5 Saturday 09

I just learned a new word: "Cuntstubble." God bless you @urbandictionary. http://bit.ly/3nNNTL

updated Sep 5, 2009 via Twitter

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