What do PETA, GoDaddy and a fly by night adultery site have in common? Their commercials are all too sexy for NBC Sport's coverage of the Super Bowl. Thanks to the Janet Jackson debacle which exposed millions of pre-pubescent boys to their first glimpse of boobie, the network has adopted puritan morals save for the outright lust of money.

Our first contestant is PETA, the People for the Eating of Tasty Animals some other such nonsense. Their ad depicts beautiful women making out with salad. If that wasn't weird enough the entire clip features a hard rock background track and smacks more of a Victoria Secret rip-off than any given shampoo commercial you might see in France.

New meaning to the phrase: I love broccoli..

In the second corner we have Adultry.Com this time parading as AshleyMadison.com. She not only encourages you to cheat but convincingly makes the point that it's far better to see an attractive model humping a football than to picture two monkeys doing so (http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&url=http%3A%2F%2Fanswers.yahoo.com%2Fquestion%2Findex%3Fqid%3D20071021175213AAOqHmI&ei=MamDSeySBpGYsAO0x5jBDQ&usg=AFQjCNFtgoiwyLfmAC5NSN3G8vrbpa6CCQ&sig2=C5vhUUDect4XmnVTDQlw8A).

actual complaint (http://blog.peta.org/archives/veggie_love.pdf) I found it to be quite invigorating. Can't say I ever considered an eggplant erotic. Second place goes to Ashely Madison's house of violated pigskins for no other reason than the sheer amount of traffic to GoDaddy's video site made the Danica shower scene unwatchable. Nice try Bob, how about going for that Dale Jr cannon thing next year? You can bet your wife's biological upgrades that millions of dejected and heavily tattooed #8 fans would love to see that.