I find myself wondering, as I am raining down kisses on my squealing baby's cheekies, if my mother ever just enjoyed being a mother. I know that she was a responsible caregiver when I was a wee thing, but I have such a hard time visualizing her just laying on the floor laughing with me or my brother.

So I have that rattling around in my head as I wean my daughter from the boobie completely and as I encourage her to go to sleep on her own, without snuggles and rocking and I worry if I am laying the first bricks in the wall of our future understanding and relationship. I might fear the consequences, but if I do this and she is independant, isn't that what I want? Will I be able to balance her feeling of independence while instilling a knowledge within that Mommy will always stand up with her against monsters and bad things?

I just don't want her to ever feel alone.

Random:

I sing the following verse to Mazzy to the tune of "On Top of Old Smokey"

My baby is cute-ness
All wrapped up in GLEE
My baby has cute-ness
As cute as can be