I am nearly 100% sure that Jasper hates me. Oh well, I guess we must learn to cope. Finally, a small window of freedom - also known as spring break. Nothing will happen. It will be boring and wasted time. Of this I am 110% sure.

I am going stir crazy. I haven't seen friends outside of school in too long. I can literally feel myself wasting away as I sit alone, being lazy... I hate it. But I hate a lot of things. Too much, probably. Everybody tells me I hate everything and that I get mad too easily and take offense to everything. Most of it - well, some of it - is meant as a joke. I guess my sense of humor is messed up?
But I don't care.

I've given up on that. I will not change myself to be liked. I figure, there's going to be someone out there that really understands me. That will love me for all the ridiculous things that I am. Plus, by changing myself, I would be letting my own foundation fall apart. And I can hope that someone might see what I do, and realize they should do the same thing. That is, be their own person.

I don't tell people things. Because, when you're told something, you tend to not want to listen to it. Maybe even prove it wrong. So if you try to help someone by telling them something, you might just make it worse - or at least delay the realization. But if you just do something that will affect them in some way and cause them to do something, you might just stimulate them to construct their own thoughts and figure it out on their own. And if they figure it out on their own, they know how they got there, and why it makes sense. And I guess that's basically all I want to do. To make people think for themselves. That's at least part of it.

I really think that if everyone would just think more, listen more, be open more, that the world would be a much better place. I really fear for our future. Not just the future of the planet, but the people here just as much. I know something major must happen soon. Some huge staple in our lives is going to collapse, and then we'll realize that some major changes must be made. It really makes me mad. I want to be part of the uprising, whenever it starts. I want to be there when the world falls apart, and when we put it back together.